DATE: 31 Oct 2008, 2:34 pm / MOOD: Horny

Are there any straight or bi sexual ladies here from cleveland, ohio. Looking to making videos for a few sites and need some straight and bi-sexual ladies for it. All I ask is D/D free. And 2 forms of id's, not my choice, it's for the content to be posted on the websites. If you are a lady that is straight or bi-sexual and you've always wanted to get into the adult industry, here is your chance. email at mr_whodini2003@yahoo.com

Whodini

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DATE: 26 Jul 2008, 7:59 am / MOOD: Horny

Choosing A Wife



A man wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing among three

likely candidates He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to

see what they do with the money.

The first does a total make over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon gets her

hair done, new make up, and buys several new outfits and dresses up very

nicely for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more

attractive for him because she loves him so much.

The man was impressed.

The second goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of

golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes.

As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money

on him because she loves him so much.

Again, the man is impressed.

The third invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times

the $5,000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a

joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future

because she loves him so much.

Obviously, the man was impressed.

The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the

money he'd given her.

Then, he married the one with the biggest boobs.

Men are like that, you know



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DATE: 26 Jul 2008, 7:55 am / MOOD: Other

A man charges into a bank wearing a balaclava and wielding a handgun.

He shouts 'this is a raid - everyone get on the floor!!', and proceeds to empty the cash drawers.

As he runs towards the door with the loot, a brave customer yanks off his balaclava.

The robber immediately shoots the customer in the head and shouts.. 'Did anybody else here see my face?'.

The robber notices another customer peering from behind a counter and goes over and shoots him in the head also.

Did anybody else see my face?' he shouts again, waving his gun around.

There is silence for a few seconds before a male voice is heard from a distant corner..

'I think my missus caught a glimpse....

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DATE: 26 Jul 2008, 7:52 am / MOOD: Horny

What did the Hurricane say to the coconut-tree? - Hold on to your nuts, this is no ordinary Blow Job!

What do you get when you cross an Owl and a Rooster? A cock that stays up all night.

What did the egg say to the boiling water? "It might take me a while to get hard I just got layed

Why did the condom cross the road? Because it was pissed off

What is the difference between a drug pusher and a prostitute? A prostitute can wash her crack

Why is it called a Wonder Bra? When she takes it off, you wonder where her tits went....

What is it when a man talks dirty to a woman? Sexual harassment. What is it when a woman talks dirty to a man? $3.99 a minute

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DATE: 26 Jul 2008, 7:50 am / MOOD: Horny

Things you shouldn´t say during sex:

-But everybody looks funny naked!
-You woke me up for that?
-Did I mention the video camera?
-Try breathing through your nose.
-A little rug burn never hurt anyone!
-Is that a Medic-Alert Pendant?
-Hurry up! This room rents by the hour!
-Can you please pass me the remote control?
-Do you accept Visa?
-ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
-On second thought, let's turn off the lights.
-And to think -- I was really trying to pick up your friend!
-Try not to leave any stains, okay?
-Hope you're as good looking when I'm sober...
-Do you get any premium movie channels?
-Try not to smear my make-up, will ya!
-Smile, you're on Candid Camera!
-I thought you had the keys to the handcuffs!
-So much for the fulfillment of sexual fantasies!
-Why am I doing all the work?
-Did you know the ceiling needs painting?
-I think you have it on backwards.
-When is this supposed to feel good?
-You're good enough to do this for a living!
-That leak better be from the waterbed!
-I told you it wouldn't work without batteries!
-Did I tell you my aunt Martha died in this bed?
-No, really... I do this part better myself!
-You look younger than you feel.
-Perhaps you're just out of practice.
-What tampon?
-Keep it down, my mother is a light sleeper...
-How long do you plan to be "almost there"?
-You mean you're NOT my blind date?

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DATE: 26 Jul 2008, 7:46 am / MOOD: Horny

After having dug to a depth of 10 yards last year, New York scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 100 years and came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 100 years ago.

Not to be outdone by the New Yorkers, in the weeks that followed, California scientists dug to a depth of 20 yards, and, shortly after, the LA Times reported that California archaeologists have found traces of 200 year old copper wire. They concluded that their ancestors had an advanced high-tech communications network in place a hundred years earlier than the New Yorkers.

One week later, the newspaper in Lochapoka, AL, reported the following: "After digging as deep as 30 yards in cotton fields near Lochapoka in Lee County, Bubba Johnson, a self-taught archaeologist, reported that he found absolutely nothing. Bubba has therefore concluded that 300 years ago, Alabama had already gone wireless!"

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DATE: 26 Jul 2008, 7:43 am / MOOD: Horny

husband is at home watching a football game when his wife interrupts, "Honey, could you fix the light in the hallway? It's been flickering for weeks now."He looks at her and says angrily, "Fix the light? Now? Does it look like I have a G.E. logo printed on my forehead? I don't think so.""Well then, could you fix the fridge door? It won't close right."To which he replied, "Fix the fridge door? Does it look like I have Westinghouse written on my forehead? I don't think so.""Fine," she says, "Then could you at least fix the steps to the front door? They're about to break.""I'm not a damn carpenter and I don't want to fix the steps," he says. "Does it look like I have Ace Hardware written on my forehead? I don't think so. I've had enough of you. I'm going to the bar!!!"So he goes to the bar and drinks for a couple hours.He starts to feel guilty about how he treated his wife, and decides to go home and help out. As he walks into the house, he notices the steps are already fixed. As he enters the house, he sees the hall light is working. As he goes to get a beer, he notices the fridge door is fixed. "Honey, how'd this all get fixed?"She said, "Well, when you left, I sat outside and cried. Just then a nice young man asked me what was wrong, and I told him. He offered to do all the repairs, and all I had to do was either screw him or bake him a cake."He said, "So, what kind of cake did you bake him?"She replied, "Hellooooo... Do you see Betty Crocker written on my forehead?"

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DATE: 26 Jul 2008, 7:40 am / MOOD: Horny

Su Wong marries Lee Wong.
The next year, the Wongs have a new baby.
The nurse brings over a lovely, healthy, bouncy,
but definitely a Caucasian, WHITE baby boy.

'Congratulations!' says the nurse to the new parents.
'Well, Mr. Wong, what will you and Mrs. Wong name the baby?'
The puzzled father looks at his new baby boy and says,
'Well, two Wong's don't make a white,
so I think we will name him...


Are you ready for this?




Sum Ting Wong
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DATE: 21 Mar 2008, 8:59 pm / MOOD: Happy

A man and his wife were working in their garden 1 day and the
man looks over at his wife and says:

'Your butt is getting really big, I mean really big.
I bet your butt is bigger than the barbecue.'
With that, he proceeded to get a measuring tape And measured
the grill and then went over to Where his wife was working And measured his wife's bottom.

'Yes, I was right; your butt is 2' wider than the barbecue!!!'

The woman chose to ignore her husband.

Later that night in bed,The husband is feeling a little frisky.
He makes some advances towards his wife.
Who completely brushes him off. 'What's wrong?' he asks.

She answers: 'Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-ass grill
For one little weenie ?'

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DATE: 20 Mar 2008, 9:41 pm / MOOD: Happy

11 PEOPLE ON A ROPE

Eleven people were hanging on a rope
under a
helicopter, ten men and one woman. The
rope was not
strong enough to carry them all, so they
decided
that one had to leave, because otherwise
they were
all going to fall.
They weren't able to name that
person, until the woman gave a very
touching speech.
She said that she would voluntarily let
go of the
rope, because, as a woman, she was used
to giving up
everything for her husband and kids or
for men in
general, and was used to always making
sacrifices
with little in return.
As soon as she finished her
speech, all the men started clapping.


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